Taylor Karas

About 6 months ago I set out to make this the best year yet. I made a ton of goals, graduated from my master’s program, and decided to start focusing on growing my social media and forming a personal brand. While this is all well and good, I have completely lost touch with my inner me. You see, it’s so easy to get caught up in the physical and visible parts of ourselves (our bodies, our school work, our social media accounts, our friends) these things provide us with direct results and satisfaction. We can see ourselves getting what we want, and it feels amazing. However, it eventually won’t mean that much if you aren’t working on self-love too.

What is self-love? It’s what I like to think of as a combo of self-awareness and appreciation. According to google, it’s the regard for one’s own well-being and happiness (chiefly considered as a desirable rather than narcissistic characteristic). Why is this important? You truly cannot find true happiness, love, and connection without it. A lack of self-love will result in difficulty in areas of confidence, relationships, success, and so much more. You may be in a relationship, you may have great success, but you will not feel connected to them.

For me, this neglect towards myself has caused me to feel a little lost, sad, anxious, and insecure. I have noticed that I have been constantly seeking validation from everyone and everything around me and feeling devastated when I don’t receive it. Why am I desperately looking for this validation? Because I’m not giving it to myself. So simple. I promised myself that I would focus on the relationship I have with myself for the remainder of this year, and will hopefully create rituals and habits that I will carry with me forever.

Continue reading “11 Ways to Increase Self-love” →

1. Believing that you are always right, or that you know everything.

We’ve all been there. We’re fighting with a boyfriend, a friend, family, or ourselves. We are so certain our perspective is not only right, but has to be true. Rarely, do we ask why. Why are you feeling this way? What belief do you have that is driving this reaction? Furthermore, it is extremely rare that we ask ourselves “What if what I believe is wrong?” In addition, when something isn’t working whether it’s in your professional or personal life we rarely ask, “What is it I’m doing wrong?” “What can I do differently next time?” It’s essential that we ask ourselves these questions. It’s essential that we accept that we just don’t know it all. If not, you are holding yourself back from growing, and eventually getting whatever it is that you are working toward.

2. Your feelings are a result of someone else and their actions.

Have you ever had your heart broken? It sucks. It’s easy to fall into the habit of blaming the person who hurt you. “I’m hurt by what (Insert name) did to me.” We blame and live in a state of sadness or anger and think “One day I’ll be ok and get over this.” The issue here is you are placing the responsibility entirely on the other person. Responsibility for what happened, and responsibility how you are now. Now this may be harsh, but that’s 100% wrong. You are responsible for your feelings, and what you do with them. Next time you are thinking, “Ugh what they did sucks and I am so hurt because of it.” Stop, and ask yourself what it is that has struck this feeling in you. Most likely, it is because what has happened has distorted your reality in some way. Maybe it’s that you are valuing the wrong things at that time. Take responsibility for how you feel, and if you don’t like it- take steps to change it.

3. Overnight success is a thing, and is pretty common.

Thanks to the media we have this false idea that people reach ultimate success overnight. This belief is propelled even further because of social media. We only see the success of others. It’s pretty rare that we see stories of people and their failed companies. However, we see the stories of people who launch a company and suddenly they’re millionaires. There is no one, and I repeat no one that is great at anything that hasn’t failed at that very thing before. If you see someone doing something at the level you want to be at know that it simply means they have failed at that one thing more than you. Rest assured that by continuing to fail, adapt, and try again that you are on the track to success. What success really needs is failure, growth, persistence, and time.

Continue reading “5 Lies that are Holding You Back” →